Just Know You're Beautiful...

Ok so I saw this post on Facebook that made me extremely pissed…It was a picture of a girl in a bathing suit on the beach and it looked as if she used to cut herself or got into a horrible car accident…more than likely the first though. The cuts were deep enough to cause scars that won’t fade so easily even with time. I read the comments on this post and most were telling her how courageous she was and how beautiful she was, and to keep fighting through her struggle (the post had a small story about how she felt she was unattractive, fat, and went on the beach showing her scars even though she was self conscience about it to aid her in her healing process). But of course there were the few who told her she was stupid for cutting herself, she shouldn’t complain about something that she did to herself, etc, etc. Why did this piss me off? This pissed me off because not one person knows anything about this girl but what was posted on Facebook. Period. The cuts WERE probably self-induced but it didn’t say in the post anywhere that she actually cuts herself. Just that she’s struggling with her self image and has been battling it for some time. So hoooooowwwww can you possibly start just assuming that she hadn’t been in a horrible car accident, or was tortured, or abused as a child, or anything? ANYTHING could have happened to her and yet people were so quick to judge and criticize and call her stupid, dumb, etc. for something that isn’t even clarified if she did it or not. Number TWO reason that this got under my skin is because if they ARE self induced, the reason why she started cutting herself probably had to do with being teased, having a rough childhood, being abused, being raped, or just an overall low self-esteem.

Now don’t sit and tell me that “there’s no such thing as having low self-esteem” or say “that’s not a reason to cut yourself because I had/have low self-esteem” because, yes…there is such a thing as having a low self esteem and, no…it may not be a reason to cut yourself but everyone reacts to certain events differently. Let me give you a scenario:

A little girl is in elementary school. She’s a shy, bashful, intelligent, friendly, nice girl. But she comes from a single parent household, mother works long hours, father is nowhere in sight, so she wears what her mother can afford. Often times being off-brand items that some kids in school tease her for. They tease her every day, always something new about her being ugly, funny-looking, dark, tar baby, whatever their mean little spirits can come up with for that day. Every day she hears this torture and goes home to not being able to talk to her mom because she’s always busy, always working. No one tells her she’s beautiful. No one tells her she’s smart. No one tells or shows her what she’s worth. The older she gets, the more of a loner she becomes. Becoming depressed, feeling unloved and unworthy. Everyone just thinks that this is just what “teenagers” do, she’ll get over it. But she never does and secretly begins hating herself. Hates how she looks, how she talks, how she walks, everything about herself she hates. Gets into high school, finally some boys are paying her attention. She thinks they care, finally feeling some feelings of self-worth because somebody “wants” her. Not realizing until she loses her virginity and her boyfriend all in one night that the “want” was for something else, not for her. She blames herself for him leaving, starts hating herself even more. Feeling worthless. Wants to die….and th

Not everyone was taught that they are worth more than anything in this world. Not everyone can just “move on” from an insult and realize that other people’s opinion of them is irrelevant. Self-esteem is one of those things that people just “assume” people have or “should” have, but the reality is, not everyone does. The reasons why vary as much as the colors in the rainbow. From being teased by classmates to being teased by parents. From being raped to being physically abused. I myself even struggle with my own self-image and it really is a struggle, a daily struggle to try to find and see your worth when you didn’t and was told everything BUT the positive about you until AFTER you already had a negative image of yourself. You never know what someone has been through to get to the place where they are right now so how DARE you judge someone who is working on being a better them? Working on feeling better about themselves and trying to change their outlook and view of their self? Everybody in this world is insecure about something. It may not always be physical, but everybody has something about themselves that they want to change or wishes they could change. Take a good, close HARD look in the mirror before you start trying to judge someone or talk shit about someone else’s progress when you don’t know their fucking struggle.

Point blank we have GOT to do better. Stop criticizing and stop assuming that everyone can do things because you do them, or that everyone should be able to handle something just because you did. God created each one of us unique and different and again I catch myself AGAIN saying that not everyone thinks the same, handles situations the same, or even views things the same. So the next time you see someone say “I overcame my fear”, “I lost 10 lbs”, “I feel pretty today”, or anything that reflects self progression, then support and give congratulations, otherwise just shut your judgmental ass up and keep it fucking moving….

And for those who need to hear it and want to hear it: You are beautiful. You are perfectly made in God’s image and let no one tell you different. Love and appreciate every inch of you, and more than anything know that you deserve to be happy and soooo much more. Much love from me to you!!!